Poem: patchworked up

6 inklings - saturday

This poem I wrote at 2am in the morning is pretty personal. Nothing too overt to be painful enough to share – but painful enough. The inspiration for this poem comes from 5 Seconds of Summer’s song, Amnesia. I’m not a 5SOS fan, but I love this song. I first heard it when a youtuber, KimmiSmiles, did a cover of it. It was stuck in my head all this week, and I wondered why. A lot of random memories came back to me this week. And this song seems to be the summation, the wormhole, for these memories. So yeah, this one really digs deep for me.

circumambient__the_over_whelming_life_by_nikkothenerd-d5grtxj

Credits go to: Nikolas Brummer

sew together the cardboard paper
the art class of greeting cards
and trips to the waiting – room
and confusing condolences to an eight – year – old
who drew a bird
with aching wings
only to discover it – caged in the ream

and suture it – with
the old newspaper – he held as he listed out stupid reasons
why her – contemplations
of the constellations
– and the distance
from the stars to our moon was shorter – than the distance from his home
to her heart -

and her innocent lack of understanding why he was cross
– stitch this with the fatalist -
the lyricist who strung the words
amnesia into a discollection – of recovery or perhaps

(and maybe it’s true,
that being whole means having two ..
and this is the meaning of less than three)

a recollection of discovery

and like a patch
am i a fool? to believe
these fragments could work together -
or scatter themselves
like spring rain on – dry – grass?

and why wouldn’t i mind? numbing the pin – pricks on cloth
clothing myself in the cold? as
this patience disguises the patent – absence
of whole -
someness
– heartedness
this patient lying in the communal ward
begging for pain – killers
and this impatient boy – lying to the common girl -
with her begging pain

why wouldn’t i mind?
as the Nevers kill me before i sleep.

- cumuloq <3

My Top 5 Favourite Female Youtube Gamers

5 tgfyv - friday

I believe a while back I did a post on my top 5 favourite female beauty youtubers. Since then, I thought that it was funny that I made a list for female beauty gurus when most of the time I spend on youtube is actually watching Let’s Plays and games – not girls putting on make-up.

Hence, today I thought it was befitting to shine the light on some BAMF youtube gamers who just so happen to also be girls.

Now, I’m not getting into the whole debate of whether the term “girl gamer” is either derogatory or empowering to the female gender within the gaming industry, but here, I just want to share with you guys these youtubers who make me proud in the field of gaming.

And no, I’m not choosing the best female MLGs around in the world – I’m choosing youtubers who have made an impression, in one way or another, to me.

5. Aureylian – Mostly Minecraft gamer (200,000+ subscribers)

5-AureylianAurey pretty much looks like Ariel in real life. I just had to say this first. I mostly watch her through her weekly, Building Game, but I admire her most because of the type of image she tries to portray to her audience.

I feel like she stands apart from some of the other gamers because she really does not attempt to (for lack of a better expression) “sell” the fact that she is a girl. She also addresses the issue which I did not want to get into, i.e. the “girl gamer” term really well. Here’s her PSA video which I believe is really well thought out.

“It is just really unfortunate that we have to do that, as girls, we have to worry about things that we wear. And I have to worry about someone insulting my intelligence …”

So if you’re looking for someone who is genuinely sincere about the way she addresses her audience, Aurey’s channel will be perfect for you!

4. Barbara Dunkelman – Marketing and Community Manager of Rooster Teeth

4-Barbara-DunkelmanKnown for her ridiculously corny puns on the Rooster Teeth Podcast (“Dammit, Barbara!”), Barbara comes in fourth in this list because of her impressive diversity in the gaming and entertainment community.

This includes, but is not limited to, being a co-director of RTX, the Rooster Teeth annual convention, a voice actress for Yang in the web-series RWBY (which I’ve only recently started watching – I’m all caught up now) and her other associations in Rooster Teeth created projects.

Personally, I feel like she’s underrated as a gamer in the community. She’s a very decent player in both FPS and platform games and she proved this in Season 2 of The Gauntlet as well as in various Let’s Plays featuring the Podcast Crew.

Plus, the fact that she was almost booted out of a male-dominated community because they did not believe a girl could love a Halo-parodied series, Redvs.Blue, so much is definitely saying something about her cred.

3. iHasCupquake a.k.a. Tiffany – Indie gamer (1,600,000+ subscribers)

3-iHasCupquakeCupquake is honestly one of the very first Minecrafters that I followed back in the days and fell absolutely in love with watching her videos.

Maybe it’s because of this reason that I’ve chosen her as one of my favourites, ’cause she’s buried a nice warm spot in my heart.

In terms of content, her more well-known Minecraft series include Minecraft Oasis and Cloud 9. She also does the Sims and a few flash and indie games here and there.

She is honestly, to me, one of the most dedicated and hardworking youtubers out there, and this is evident when you look at her large and supportive community. I mean, just check out the wikia entirely dedicated on her.

She also gives small showcases to smaller Youtubers from the gaming community on her weekly vlog series, Piece of Quake. Therefore I feel like, as a youtuber, she really makes an effort to not only share her love of games, art etc. but also attempt to know the people who watch her.

2. Meg Turney – Youtube Personality, Cosplayer (170,000+ subscribers)

2-Meg-TurneyI started watching Meg back when she was in SourceFed. There, during Head2Head matches, I always rooted for Meg to win – and no, not because she was girl – but because she honestly was the only one who could possibly beat Philip DeFranco‘s winning streak on the channel.

To me, Meg is a powerhouse nerd. She has the cultural knowledge and know-how around fandoms, anime and gaming, and she is also a more than decent gamer herself – especially when it comes to Nintendo games.

Right now, she is currently working as a co-host for The Know with Rooster Teeth. So, yes, she is totally BFFs with the above mentioned Barbara Dunkelman.

Honestly, out of the Youtubers I’ve mentioned so far, I feel as though if Meg Turney were in a Youtuber gaming competition, I would feel more than confident to root for her all the way to the end. She has that competitive edge to stand apart from her male counterparts in the industry, and I feel that this is what will keep her in her profession for a very long time.

1. Dodger a.k.a. Brooke Lawson – Polaris Youtuber (480,000+ subscribers)

1-PressHearttoContinueDodger is definitely my current favourite gamer. I discovered her from Polaris’ Friend Zone where she is the host of a two-and-a-half-hours-long livestream where a bunch of Youtubers get together to play games (tabletop, cards and video games) and talk together in onesies.

Yes it is as awesome as it sounds.

Whenever I want to just chill-out, I’ll click a random Friend Zone episode and she’s there to liven up my afternoon.

Just like Meg, I feel as though she has all the cultural gaming knowledge and skills to give any gaming guy a run for his money – which is probably why she is a regular host on almost all the shows of Polaris, a sub-network of Maker Studios that focuses mainly on gaming content.

I also love Dodger for her personality – and I think you really need to watch one of her videos to discover why. She has the most infectious laugh and bubbly enthusiasm necessary for her to climb this list and make it on top.

Oh, and just to show you how incredible Friend Zone looks, here’s a screencap of them playing Celebrity Heads (Dodger’s in the yellow fox onesie):

Friend Zone

And that’s all from me for today! I hope you discovered some lovely new women from this list. Some honourable other mentions (and you can go google them yourself) include RPGMinx, Rachelkip and Suzy from Game Grumps. Also, if I missed out any of your adamant favourites, don’t be afraid to list them down in the comments.

Enjoy your weekend, readers, and stay tuned for more content!

Cumuloq <3

Disclaimer: All photos are not mine and belong to their original sources

Massive Update! ALS, Thank You’s and So Much Nintendo LPs

7 the rest - sunday

Hi guys!

It’s been a while since I’ve done a weekly update, so I thought that this week would be as good as any to get one done, especially since there’s been a lot going on.

So what’s been happening with me? I’m currently on my third – or fourth – week back in school (I’m currently doing a year for a diploma). It’s been very hectic with assignments and group work and readings and it’s been a while since I’ve had to deal with homework. So I’m kind of over-stressing right now. All that I have been capable of doing for this blog is my 30 Days of the Doctor Challenge, which is over and completed! :)

Also, I got nominated for a Liebster Award, which was a great experience. I got to discover a handful of wonderful blogs and bloggers. I took it as a humbling experience. It’s been hard work to keep this blog up and to not deter from writing on it.It’s awesome to get some recognition for it. It is also awesome to pass it down to those who have worked as hard (and probably harder) than I do.

For me it’s necessary to think back to why you started a blog to begin with, and to not forget the reasons why as you continue writing and updating.

After all of this has been said, let me add in some of my favourites for the past few weeks:

1. Songs:

2. Youtube Videos:

3. Lets Play Videos/Series:

4. Trailer: The Theory of Everything

As you can tell there are just too many videos to just embed into one long blog update so I decided to just list them out for your picking. Things I want to bring attention to:

Firstly, ALS Ice Bucket Challenge – so me choosing the Stuart Edge prank does not mean that that video was my favourite out of all the ALS Bucket Challenges that I saw. Frankly all of the ones I’ve seen are amazing and creative in their own way. Obviously a person’s favourite would probably depend on who their favourite celebrity or online personality is, so it’s kind of impossible to rule out one over the other.

Personally, to say that any was better than the other would be completely missing the point of the entire viral effort to raise awareness for Lou Gehrig’s disease. If you have only been watching the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge without even clicking on the website for it, then please do so here: www.alsa.org. Personally, I cannot imagine what it would be like to get such a disease, and I can only hope that the money raised is really being put to good use.

Secondly, I realise a trend of mine at the moment is to watch a lot of Mario Bros. games and that’s why my LP section is flooded with them. You can go and check out any of the LPs I have mentioned, ’cause their honestly all amazing and filled with laughter. I usually watch them while I’m having my lunch or dinner in front of the computer, now that I’m back in hall in uni.

Lastly, I know it’s been a while and that since then I’ve gotten quite a number of new followers. I’d like to take up the last spaces of this post to say thank you for following me. I’m no one really extraordinary, but it means a lot that you find my content interesting to you in one way or another.

Till next time!

Cumuloq <3

30DDC Day 30: What I want to see in Series 8

DDC-30Day1

And here we are, about a hundred gifs and dozen of videos later, on the last day of the 30 Days of the Doctor Challenge. Tomorrow, the new Doctor Who episode for Series 8 will be out. Us Whovians have been waiting for this with bated breath.

Despite the apparent spoilers that have gone around that have spoilt the initial launch of this new series, I have been keeping myself mostly in the dark. Unlike most fans who have probably watched Doctor Who all their lives since they were young, completely immersed in the fandom, I’ve pretty much started watching it in December last year, and try to keep myself apart from all the hype – it feels as if there is a difference between my twelve-year-old Harry Potter fandom self and me now.

All that I currently know of are the teaser trailers and the episode synopsis that Steven Moffat has recently released. (You can find them here.)

So, what do I want to see from Series 8?

DDC-30Day2

Firstly I want to see what the dynamics between Clara and this new Doctor will be like. It’s apparent that Clara and the 11th Doctor had a strange friendship bordering on possible romance that can be paralleled to Martha and the 10th Doctor – but now that Peter Capaldi has put his foot down against a love interest developing, I’m excited to see how the friendship will develop.

Personally, I’m looking forward to new companions as well. Not that I don’t love Jenna, but I would love to see other possibilities. I’m also looking forward to new villains that can possibly rival the Weeping Angels and the Silence, ones that challenge the new doctor and also enable him to show more wrath against his enemies.

I’m also hoping to see the writers explore more on the themes of humanity. I hope they don’t take the “time travel” aspect for granted and try to push more boundaries in terms of understanding human compassion or hatred. I think with today’s circumstances, with all the heated debates on war and human rights, Series 8 of Doctor Who should try and wrestle with the differing views of our place in the world to make decisions for ourselves and others.

Enough talk.

Series 8 tomorrow! Excited! For now enjoy the trailer:

- Cumuloq <3

30DDC Day 29: Favourite Music/Song

“I am the Doctor”

Honestly, I don’t browse the range of Doctor Who music from the past few years, but I remember this one passing through my dashboard when I was on Tumblr last month and I absolutely loved it and bonked myself on the head for not listening to the Doctor Who soundtracks more. If you guys have any other suggested tracks, or better options, feel free to let me know.

- Cumuloq <3