My Personal Journey of Acceptance of Cory Monteith’s Death

3 movies+tvshows - wednesday

I first heard the news of his passing via SMS from my boyfriend while I was walking around a shopping centre and, at the time, didn’t really react too drastically to it. Of course, I thought it was tragic, but I didn’t really think too much of the implications his death would have on the world. Another celebrity gone, just one that was more closer to my heart than, say, Whitney Houston or Michael Jackson. Those were icons of my parent’s generation.

It wasn’t until I got back home, after watching The Pacific Rim (is it kind of coincidental that Cory died only a few hours ago in the room of a Canadian hotel named the Pacific Rim Hotel?) , that it finally hit me. And isn’t it so that social media has a way of making events more momentous than you can first begin to comprehend them? When I got home and online one of the first signs of his passing was from a friend on Facebook who shared this gif set:

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Little did I realise that, like many things that appear on Facebook, it was only the tip of the iceberg of images I’d see of the Cory/Finn montage. When it comes to capturing a moment, Tumblr bloggers really know about “the feels”. And somehow it was inspiring how so many fandoms came together to support the Gleeks on the lost of their icon (links to the original Tumblr posters attached to the photos):

Capture standwithyou

So it was at this moment, scrolling down my dashboard (along with the Twitter feed and trends like #RipCoryMonteith and #PrayforLea) that I saw how so many lives were actually affected by his death. It wasn’t just the death of a person, but the death of someone who had stood as a figure of hope and of happiness. And that was the reason why so many fandoms were touched by that moment, whether they were fans of Cory or not, they could relate to this possible scenario occurring in their lives, like how Harry Potter fans may relate it to the untimely death of the first Dumbledore, Richard Harris. Or really any fandom with the death of a loved character in their show.

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idols are human

For me, Cory was a significant icon in my life, I’m not ashamed to admit that. I watched Glee mainly ’cause of Lea Michele. Glee came at the perfect moment when I was a fan of Spring Awakening, and seeing Jonathan Groff and Lea Michele singing on TV was like a dream come true for someone who could never watch their performance in New York.

And Finn was very much a part of that moment. My boyfriend and I grew closer from catching Glee episodes every week and relating our relationship to Finn and Rachel. So to see Cory gone forced me to put myself in Lea’s shoes. But it is difficult, ’cause I could not imagine (and still cannot imagine) the heartache she must have, when she was all ready to be wed to the man in two weeks time. And for that a lot of my condolences go to her.

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Only a few hours ago, BBC news along with many other news sources released the results of the post-mortem examination, which determined “a mixed-drug toxicity involving heroin and alcohol” was the cause of death. It was apparent that Cory was under rehabilitation and treatment, but it is really sad that, after so many efforts towards recovery, he had to go this way.

This post has reflected on all the optimism that has resulted from Cory’s death. I understand that there were many moments of his passing that showed more uglier sides of humanity (*cough cough* Westboro Baptist Church) and, once again, the ability of social media to once again dupe the general public with false representations of the truth (I’ve addressed this before with the Boston marathon tweets). I would rather not address and flame these negative representations of Cory, or give them the attention they do not deserve.

As a whole, I’d rather reflect on the joy Cory has brought to others. ‘Cause his scenes on Glee always made me smile, his voice always had so much sincerity in it and he always came off as a genuine and kind-hearted person. And I sincerely hope that (“if heaven exists”), as he mentioned in his interview on Inside the Actors Studio, that God does give Cory a good explanation as to why he has “not been around” and give him the rest and love he deserves.

And lastly …

largeTill next time!

cumuloq ❤

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